Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Stupid Question & Sharp Answer

BOY : May I hold your hand?


GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.



GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!

BOY : You love me...



GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??

BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??



GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.

BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple



GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.

BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??



BOY : I love you and I could die for you!

GIRL : How soon??



BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??



SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??

TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.



MAN : You remind me of the sea.

WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?



MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.



HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.
MARY : John says I'm pretty.

Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think, Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".

Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".Teacher : "Why?"

Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".
Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"

Pupil : "A teacher".Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other colors do you have?

Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".

Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".

Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"

David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated".
Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"

Student : "Brotherly love".
Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"

Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".
Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"

Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died".

Teacher : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"One Student : "
Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."

Teacher : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."

No comments: